Clubhouse 4 Song Rule

I miss him everyday, and wish he was still here. Just know, he is in my heart.

…The Clubhouse! The infamous CLUBHOUSE. The clubhouse was our sanction. It was a stupid old hot tub room off of the Lajoie’s garage. It had a fridge we packed soda’s and redbulls, mountain dews etc. that of course one day turned into beer. The room had a HUGE old school stereo that was yellow, the kind you would see maybe on a construction site. It was badass because it played the radio and you could also plug in your IPOD. Hence, the 4 song rule.

The 4 song rule came from me, Tim, Tyler, Jack, Joe, Nick and Liam having sooooooooooooo much diversity in music taste. Joe liked rap. He liked hip hop. He liked EDM and techno and party jams and he liked LIVING. Because we always didn’t want to listen to Joe’s rap 😉 and my country and John Mayer, we created a rule where each member could play their 4 songs in a row without any interruptions, and then someone else got a turn.

When we had music playing in the background, we always forgot we hated it. ahahaha. I hated Joe’s rap, Joe hated Tim and Tyler’s “heavier” music. They hated hated my country. But we loved each other. And we were all buds.

Before college, I remember Joe as a quiet soldier. I knew him through Tim and Ty. I remember his with curly brown hair, his honest soul and sense of humor. He thought things were stupid. I think a lot of things are stupid. We connected.

We liked the same things, we had the same friends. We liked to walk to McDonalds together and make prank phone calls. We made fun of things together. Joe was underrated. Joe was intelligent. Joe was bright. Fast forward to college, I remember meeting up with Joe after he moved in and going to the dining hall with him. Again, the quiet soldier. He was overwhelmed. He was nervous. But he was curious.

I brought him with me to meet my friend Katie outside of Cance and Patterson Dorms in Southwest after eating at Berk. Us 3 sat on the hill looking out to the parking lot where the football stadium is. We gave him soooooooo much advice about freshman year. I knew he was nervous, but I remember feeling happy that he knew if he ever needed a friend who knows him from home at umass that i’d be there.

From there I saw Joe at Berk when we’d text to meet up for dinner. I met his friends and would come by to hang at his dorm. I had a car on campus so I used to buy Joe’s iced coffee and drop him off at the library. One of these years I met you Kim! You picked me and Joe up outside of JQA and McKimmie. Joe put headphones on the front seat and you and I talked the whole 2 hours hahaha. I remember that. I remember our parents driving him and I back to school and my Dad and Mom got to know him.

I don’t know and will never know why he is not with us. But what I have the utmost faith in is that he. is. where. he. is. thriving. Don’t we all deserve that? Foe Jinn is at peace, and I remember his soul in this way. Joe was not his addiction. Joe was my friend.

I miss him. We have named our modern day ‘four song rule’ clubhouse spotify playlist after him with his photo:

Kim, you have a great son, not had. You HAVE a great son. Fuck addiction. Joe is not that. Joe is somewhere where he is intended to be. And you, along with your family, his friends, will be returned to him soon.

With all of my love ,

Lizzie

February 13, 2019